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« خوب بالاخره همان طور که | صفحه اول | بسياری از مردم دنيا که »

چهارشنبه 28 اسفندماه 1381


۱۰ ساله بودم که اولين

۱۰ ساله بودم که اولين شليک گلوله واقعی را به چشم خود ديدم و آنزمان انقلاب ۱۳۵۷ بود و من از لای درب منزل مادر بزرگم در تبريز شاهد بودم که سربازی بعد از فرار از گروهان خود و سر دادن شعار عليه شاه در کوچه ای بن بست اقدام به خودکشی کرد و اين درست در مفابل ديدگان من اتفاق افتاد و بعدها هر گاه به آن کوچه ميرسيدم هميشه آن صحنه مقابل ديدگانم قرار می گرفت بعدها اسم آن خيابان به نام سرباز شهيد نام گذاری شد و من نيز داست فراموشم می شد که جنگ ايران و عراق شروع شد اين يکی را بسياری به خاطر داريد و خاطر های آنرا نيز!
تاثير آن هشت سال به اين زوديها از بين نخواهد رفت و شايد چند نسل بايد با آن خاطره ها
زندگی کنند و نقل فرزندانشان بکنند که چه اتفاقی افتاده است و ...
بعدها من نيز به همان نقل خاطره ها برای فرزندانم فکر می کردم و آرزو می کردم که هيچ وقت آنها شاهد وقوع جنگ نباشند اما اين آرزوی من ديری نپاييد و جنگی پس از ديگری به وقوع پيوست و همچنان نيز ادامه دارد. ظاهرا اين دور پايانی برايش متصور نيست و آنها خود بايد شاهد اين وقايع باشند.
امروز صبح که با سحر دخترم تلفنی صحبت می کردم او از من ناراحت بود که چرا او را با خود به مسافرت نبردم تا برايش خوش بگذرد!! ولی سپهر پسرم که بزرگتر است و
می داند که من کجا هستم از سحر نگرانتر صحبت می کرد او هيچ وقت دوست ندارد من به جاهايی مثل اينجا و افغانستان بروم و خوب اين وسط رقيه همه اين استرسها را بايد تحمل کند که البته خيلی از دست من شاکی است الان که چرا همه مسوليت بچه ها را او بايد بر عهده بکشد و من از اين بابت کاملا به او حق می دهم.



 

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